Chapter 54 of Tim and Michel
We are back again. More to follow as I am a few chapters ahead so I know I will be able to continue again. Let me know what you think or write a response on the bottom.
(Jamey still narrating )
The next day was hell. I wanted to know what happened between Martin and his dad but no one was answering the phone. I called Michel as I knew he had the number for William’s mobile phone, but Michel wasn’t answering either. My granddad kept looking at me but I just didn’t feel like talking. I didn’t have the numbers for Paul or Dennis … stupid, I know, and strange. And as for Brandon … well, I suspect he had enough on his plate, dealing with Justin. I’d just have to wait till Monday at school to find out what was going on.
That I was lost is an understatement. I knew my dad wouldn’t understand … for, if I’d been Tim’s dad, I definitely wouldn’t understand the situation … so I felt completely lost. Mom had tried to be there for me. I’m not so sure if she knew what was happening … I suspect she did … but she just didn’t care at the moment.
And then there was Tim. What had I done to him? Where was he and how was he? I just didn’t know what to do. I’d called Keith, the policeman friend of Jamey’s granddad … but he said that there was no news at the moment. It seemed the police had gone with Justin to his home but either they were keeping everything hush hush, or there was really nothing to report. Most of the day I just stayed in my room, staring at the ceiling. From time to time I nibbled some of the food mom urged me to eat.
I’d had a call from Seph and we talked a bit. He told me I had done the right thing and that I was not to blame. I’d done what needed to be done at the time and it was Tim’s mother who was responsible … if she was really behind it. It was she who was to blame for what happened to Tim.
With my head I knew he was right, but my heart told me otherwise. I’d been thinking about driving around and trying to find him but there was little chance he was somewhere here in town. No, I just had to try to hang in, making sure I could be there for Tim when he came back. My dad had not said anything since we’d come home. I think it was all just too much for him to deal with. He’d been happy for me when I brought Tim home but this new situation was beyond his ability to cope. I wasn’t looking forward to going to school but staying home was the last thing that I wanted to do.
William had been with me that morning. He’d seen that I hadn’t slept very much. It had been an odd evening the night before. My dad would not say anything but just kept looking at me from time to time. Mom would ask me if I was OK every time I moved. In the end I went upstairs early but I couldn’t sleep. My dad had forbidden me from seeing Jamey and William would be responsible for getting me home right after school. I’d tried to talk with him but he’d just walked away. Actually, he had turned around and told me he would punish me if I didn’t listen. So, here I was on Sunday morning, tired and fed up … without any idea what the future held. Oh, yeah … and I’d been thinking about Tim a lot and how he was coping. I just hoped he was OK. My talk with William had helped a bit … he was still there for me and he would help me if I needed it … but he also had to be careful.
But then there was school. William must have left his friends and he’d been getting calls from them, asking if everything was OK. Would it stay quiet or was what happened going to become public knowledge? If that happened, I didn’t know if I could face school. Being gay would be something I’d need to deal with anyway … so I didn’t see a problem coming out … but would I be able to deal with people who didn’t understand what happened to me? The experience was something that I had been slowly starting to understand during the last year … and, with Jamey around, it had all made sense. I understood it all a lot better. Most important … it felt good and that was something that was critical … but I just wasn’t able to explain it to others. It was what it was. Maybe in the future, I could articulate how I felt. For now, I’d just have to see what was going to happen tomorrow.
I was happy. I felt like I was in seventh heaven. It hadn’t been easy but, with everything that had transpired and our parents going to pick us up, we had to make sure we were solid for each other. I knew it wasn’t easy for Dennis … but he understood. I’d known from the first time we had fooled around. I’d still had doubts then … but everything felt good when I took hold of his dick in my hands. When I saw his face as he came, I knew I loved him and I’d do anything for him to have that feeling again.
I knew it was different for him … or, at least, I thought that it was in the beginning. As we got older and we played less, I realised he was straight and it would certainly end. I’d been depressed … but then, when we got to know about Tim and Michel, I’d seen Dennis change again. Not quickly … slowly … and that weekend, well it had been great being together at night. It had felt like our first times together … but with a little bit extra. Dennis seemed to be into it more than before. So when we knew it would all come out, I asked him what we should say. Were we just playing around … or was there something more between us? I knew when I looked into his eyes. I smiled. Since we chatted last night, I knew what Dennis wanted. He said he knew what he wanted … and he was ready to tell the world if necessary.
I told him … let’s start with our parents and then see where this went. He’d been surprisingly OK with that. Later that evening, my mom told me that she’d known for the past few years … or at least suspected it. So I felt great. I knew that Dennis would probably still need some time to adjust to this new reality. We agreed we’d see each other later that day … so that was good.
I did see Justin leave when my dad picked me up in his car. We hadn’t talked very much yet but, when he started to drive, he told me to be quiet. I knew what he wanted to know so, quietly, I told him about us … about me … how I came to realise I was gay … the fun I’d with Tim … and then being introduced to Justin. I told him about Justin and Tim being family and what had happened with his mother. He responded that it seemed to him that he needed a good lawyer to put her behind bars when he was finally freed. I wasn’t sure that was the way for him to show that he was fine with what had happened … it felt strange.
Now mom was a different story. She was always more religious than any of us and she had a hard time dealing with it. I guess it was difficult, knowing that I wouldn’t be the one to produce grandchildren for her … and that that responsibility would now be left to my brother. He was happy about my announcement, and told me later that evening that he knew immediately what my announcement meant to him. He told me that I was always looking at him more with lust than disgust … so he knew I might have been gay. He was OK with it though.
When I woke up, I dialled Justin’s mobile number. I was very happy when he answered. We talked and it seemed that his mom was really onside with our relationship … but both he and his mother were disturbed that his aunt was opposed. They started to realise that there must be something really, really wrong with her. They hadn’t heard anything from her, and they doubted that they ever would. I thought about calling Michel but I wasn’t sure who would answer and left it … because we’d see him tomorrow.
As you might guess, I was up very early on the Monday morning. I looked at the clock and wanted to go, the faster the better. I needed to know how he was doing. I sat on the stairs in front of the building and waited. After about 10 minutes a car drove up. I knew that car. I saw William and Martin got out. His dad was behind the wheel and watched them leave. They didn’t look at me although, from the vibe I got, I’m sure that Martin had seen me. They walked towards the door. Just when I was about to stand up, I felt something. I looked back at the car. Martin’s dad’s eyes were focussed on me. He didn’t drive off … he stayed right there. I wasn’t sure what he wanted me to do, but following them into the school building just didn’t feel like the smart thing to do. We both stayed where we were. As more and more kids came around, I slowly started to feel cold. I knew I had to move forward and go inside. I smiled at him and in I went.
I didn’t expect them to be standing around, so I checked the three main corridors to see if I could see them. Along the last one, I saw that they were stopped by some of William friends and I started to walk towards them. But before I could reach them, William pushed Martin away towards his classroom. William looked over his shoulder. He wasn’t smiling; he almost looked apologetic. Now I was lost. This would be a lot more difficult than any one of us had ever could have imagined.
……. And so the days passed by and nothing changed. Phone calls were not answered … people got in the way. Justin didn’t want to do too much with Brandon because of his friendship with Michel … but then, what Justin didn’t know was that virtually none of us had any contact with Michel at all. He kept to himself. He stayed home for quite a few weeks before coming back to school. By then the story had become old news. Now people were discussing the kind of relationship Michel had with Tim. Not in front of his face, of course … but you could see people look and talk whenever they were just out of his hearing. And Tim? Well, nothing was heard of him. My granddad was in contact with Keith a lot. The first calls were strained, but over time, it became easier to talk normally. Yeah, Keith was OK and no, there was no news about Tim. And with each call, it was becoming harder to get a feeling about how all of this was going to end.
[Writer’s commentary: I’m sure my readers have noticed that I took quite a leap there in time, something I hardly ever do. But the story got stuck in its own way and I had to find a way out. I hope I can now move the story forward. As you will read the next segment of the story, you’ll understand that we have jumped forward in time for a reason. That intervening time is not unimportant, but its significance will be revealed in flashbacks. Future chapters will detail what happened … and all will become clear, I promise. So let’s start with a bit of the next chapter so you get an idea where we are going. Surely you didn’t think I’d leave you hanging?]
“Jamey?” my granddad said.
“Jamey?” he repeated. I looked up from the book I had in my hands.
“Are you OK?” he asked.
“Yeah,” I said and continued to read my book.
“Hmmmm … I doubt it, to be honest. You haven’t turned a page for 30 minutes now.”
I realised he was right: I’d been staring at the book but not really reading.
“Yeah, I’m fine … just a bit preoccupied.”
“Martin?” he asked.
“Yeah … partly about him … but also the others. It was a great gang you know. We had lots of fun.”
“You wanna talk about it?”
“Not sure there is much to say, to be honest. It doesn’t exist any more.”
“You really going to let this destroy everything … without trying to make it work?”
“I tried, granddad. Nobody is talking to anyone.”
I don’t think he had any answers, either, as he stopped talking at that point. My eyes drifted back to the book.
Yummy. Martin … I still got very wobbly in the legs when I thought about him. My mind would turn into one big excited state of bliss when I saw him. I could hardly function when I was in the same room with him. Still it was difficult to talk with him. William was there and he told me there were others recruited by his dad to keep an eye on me. He told me that … not to warn me off … but so I’d know the dangers.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw my granddad get up. I’m not absolutely sure but I think he went towards the hall which led upstairs and to the front door. I tried to start reading again.
“Jamey?” I looked up when my granddad said my name.
I saw that he’d returned … followed by someone.
“Jamey, this gentlemen is here to see you.”
The stranger came into the room now and I vaguely recognised him.
“You’re Jamey, young man?”
“Yeah, that’s me.”
“Good. I was told it would be best to come and talk to you and your granddad.”
“Told by whom?” my granddad asked, as I was still a bit in my own world.
“Michel’s uncle,” he said while looking directly at me.
I knew then and there where I’d seen him: he was one of the few old men who had been there at the party that was held for Tim and Michel at Michel’s uncle club.
“Oh, yeah … we met there,” I said to him while I stood up and shook his hand.
“Please, sit down. How is Michel’ uncle?”
“Fine … but he’s worried about his nephew right now.”
I didn’t want to go into that. I wasn’t sure I could talk about it.
“You know what happened?” my granddad asked.
“Yes. I heard about it and, since I knew both Tim and Michel and some of the group involved, I kept myself informed. I contacted Michel’s uncle earlier this week in the hope that he could help me with setting up a meeting with some of the younger guys I met at the party.”
I saw a strange look on my granddad’s face. “Why?” he asked suspiciously.
“Oh, nothing like that,” our guest said quickly. “I wanted to introduce my nephew to them. He lives down here as well and I wanted him to make some friends who are dealing with the same kinds of feelings and issues as he is himself … if you know what I mean.”
I felt myself blush and my granddad said, “Gay feelings, you mean?”
“Yes …and other stuff, too.”
We were all silent for a minute or two.
“I’m not sure it’s appropriate for me to listen in on this conversation. Maybe it’d be better if you talk with Jamey in private.”
“No, I want you to stay. This isn’t about that. This is about Michel and sweet Tim.”
“You know where he is?” I asked.
“No … well ….”
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